From the desk of Mreh8er:

                      This is my reply to a request made here.First I may need to explain a little about how I think.I am an analytical thinker.This basically means I think alot and use logic versus emotions.  I analyze things and on top of that I think laterally.I believe in thinking things out and I also believe the world would be a better place if everybody else did the same.I know the world doesn’t spin to my specs, but that is my philosophy.Many great Kings have pondered in the past and many wars have been won and peacetimes created thru the process of pondering.I believe in thinking ,and I believe in free thinking.

I want Slavegurl to have a place to think also.It slows her down and mellows her out and gets her to a place that I want her to be and she wants to be too.A meditative reflection time or whatever you choose to call it.Hence the “Ponder Unit”……her place to stand and think about it.It is a simple piece of equipment that is highly effective.It is made of metal and stands tall.I cuff her hands up over her and cuff her ankles to the side bars.She likes the feeling of not being able to move as it helps her focus.

It is a very simple piece of equipment that we enjoy.

…..flickers thanks to the glow of a dear friend. She has a special place in my heart for many reasons. The most recent to come to light, yet again, is her ability to make me think. As we do the email/phone call chit chat across the miles, she inspires me to think about things I haven’t and to approach things I have thought about from a different angle. It is astonishing to me.
 
Recently we were discussing humiliation in our respective Master/sub-slave relationships. A bit of history…I had experienced a struggle with something that Master had said to me during a session earlier in the week. I did not respond the way that either of us was expecting, and I do believe He was just as surprised at the time as I have become. He did not say it with the intent to humiliate me. On the contrary, it was spoken to motivate me. To give me that extra ummpfh I needed to get over a spot, if you will. Even though it was not intended as humiliation, as I conversed with my friend, it became clear to me that there was something to be learned here.  I started examining what I percieved as humiliating, and why I reacted the way I did.

She was sharing with me that humiliation was a difficult thing for her at times. She also shared that the times her Master has taken her down as far as she can go……He has always brought her back up.  He never leaves her with those feelings that she has after big humiliation. He always lifts her back up.
 
As I read those words, I saw a flicker in the corner of my mind. As I walked toward it, what began to come out of the fog were questions. Possibly silly ones, but never the less, I can learn from them just in knowing the answers.
 
In analyzing the reaction I had to His words that night, I realized that it stemmed from fear. Fear that Master actually believed me to be weak. I began to wonder, is this fear holding me back from total surrender?

He is molding me into the slavegurl He desires, and that does require some degree of dis-assembly and reassembly. Do I trust that He can tear me down, strip me of my self esteem, my fears, and all my arrogance, only to rebuild me and lift me back up to my cherished place in His eyes, stronger than ever?  This is ponder food.

Last weekend, Master called me to the study. As I walked in, He pointed to the open closet door and said, “Get in.” Hesitating, I moved slowly towards the closet, with a curious look on my face, and the word why coming out of my mouth. I realize now how miserably I failed that test…..My actions and feelings were far from trust and surrender…..I was obedient…but with reluctance.

It is becoming clearer to me where my focus needs to be.

Hi there! I see that Master has been here…I adore when He comes here to post! I do believe what Master posted….We are growing by leaps and bounds. Our journey is one filled with learning and fun. I am becoming more and more comfortable in communicating to Master things that I like and some things that I would like to try. Like last night, for example….I shared with Him that I was having naughty thoughts about a car wash that we had used on Saturday. I wanted to go and wash my car in the nude. It had really really thick purple suds and I thought they would look really pretty all over boobs and ass. Master agreed and off we went, with me in nothing but my locked ankle and wrist cuffs, black leather collar and a tee shirt with tennis shoes. What a fashion statement! I really did feel so decadent!

Being the writer He is, He needed to survey the area, making sure there would be no trouble, and we would run minium risk of getting caught. We found that the bays had security cameras. NUTS! Master snapped a pic of me sitting in the car as He washed it and that was the best we could do. But on the way home Master shared that He had been wanting a picture of me with the town scarecrows. They have a festivel around these parts and there are tons of homemade scarecrows all around. He stopped on the side of the road, focused the camera, and I ran over to the fence, raised my shirt and He snapped. Running back to the car I could hardly breathe from giggling so much. Then He decided He wanted an ass shot of course…..so off I went again…bending over the not so stable fencing and raising my shirt once more. Much fun!

Later in the evening, we had a learning experience. I did not handle well one of the ways that Master motivates. His words bit deeper and more intense than any sensation He was causing on my flesh. I did manage to compose myself, and continue on to what was a very nice scene. When I started coming back down, I began to try and process what had happened earlier. In that state of mind, I process rather slowly, so I don’t think I was done until this morning. I did my best to explain how the words had made me feel and I can only hope that He can understand.

Master has promised me a waxing this afternoon, so I shall end now. Don’t forget to Click on the pictures to make them bigger!

Take care……….

From the desk of Mreh8er:

               Hello all and at 13000 plus visitors,  I know you are out there. 60 FABULOUS days now Slavegurl has been on Georgia soil and I thought I would post about it. I know there are alot of you who are contemplating a move someday as you meet someone, (you may even be contemplating a play visit with us) and I understand you can gain good insight from these kind of posts for your own knowledge. Moving is a big thing and of coarse it takes planning and more planning and the committment of both the Master and his/her sub to make it happen. I know there are some who will just go on a whim ( and to you I wish you well) but for the others who love to get the scoop on things welcome.

             Slavegurl, after many months of us communicating, came to visit me for a week. We had a great time and after hundreds of hours of webcams and telephone calls, meeting in person was still very nice and very synergetic. We sparked, we connected , and we knew (neither of us being teenagers) that we had something here. Something you don’t find often and something we could definetly build on. As humans we all have an energy that flows around us and when 2 people can join and feel the energy flowing evenly around them… you have true chemistry. Only 1 factor of importance but still very needed. We had established in those previous months the ground work for a good dynamic; that being trust established, boundaries duly noted, schedules understood, and that liars need not apply. With those simple principles mastered we were able to advance rapidly. Slavegurl started to evolve….

       It began with me giving her the name Slavegurl. It fit her well. I believed her to be more slave than sub. From there we were able to focus on other things in here jouney as a sensual slave. This is where she feels her best and does her best too. Finding that one distinction for us was a great start. She began this blog shortly thereafter and it has  been a good journal of her journey. She is growing in herself and in 60 days she has gone from the feeling of longing and afraid to ask about things to being able to communicate openly about what she wants to experience and what she has enjoyed thus far. It would be insane for me to think that whatever I have in store for her in an evening is just what she needs or wants…..her daily activities sometimes invite her mind to wander to places and it brings to her mind new things to share with me which we incorporate in playtime. Sharing is good, protocal is still observed, and we can communicate effectively her wants and needs that will lead her to subspace. 60 days and we are growing.

      In 60 days we have moved her here, set up the place, she has found a great job, and has taken 2 trips to the hospital for the same situation.There is nothing more sobering than going to the hospital. For a Master even more so when it is his slave that needs to go. Unexpected sickness is nothing any of us wants, but it happens. She is fine now, but the question remains: Did we handle it the best we could…did I do all that I could in getting her there? In her words: “You bet.”So yet another situation that has allowed us to grow…..all part of the deal. All part of the evolution.

        Slavegurl has a ponder unit we use for her just about everyday, there is room for 2 and she looks forward to having  playmates ponder with her. She is able to get in the mindset I want her in on the unit and it also allows me free access to her as I please. She knows that it is her place to think and contemplate life. She is locked up on the unit now as I type this post. She is blindfolded and cuffed and loving it. Our next investment on equipment will be a spanking sawhorse with leather. She has voiced her interest in this piece of furniture so I look forward to finding a nice quality one for her. She enjoys being strapped in as much as I enjoy strapping her in.

Slavegurl is getting used to the South and the traffic finally……a move is always difficult and learning a new area even more so but she is doing well and her service to me is pleasing. I enjoyed taking pics of her at the carwash last eve, perhaps she will share them with you………

Master has been quite attentive lately? Can you tell? *giggle*  All is well here. Hoping to get a hefty post done this weekend!!! This is what happens when there are too many commercials on tv on a Sunday afternoon!!!  

On the way home from work, I sent the text. “May I please have some hard play tonight Master?” Not two minutes later the phone was ringing. We discussed what hard meant, and He said that I had been well behaved lately and that He thought He could accommodate me. teehee 

I found myself looking forward to being cuffed up all night. Soon, though, I was wondering what the fuck I was thinking!!! About a third of the way through, something happened and I got a case of the giggles. I absolutely could not stop them. That is when the paddling began. He turned me around and started whacking me until I stopped giggling. But that was only the beginning. And also about as far as I can remember. The last thing I remember consiciously thinking was, STOP GIGGLING and He will put the paddle down. From the photos, I was terribly wrong. But He was giggling too, so it was soooo hard. I adore hearing Him laugh!

Much later, I found myself lying on the bed. I listened for Master and heard the shower running..I knew He was near. I didnt move until I heard His voice again, instructing me to get up and get myself ready for bed. I am not sure that my feet hit the floor as I performed my nightly routine. Sweet peace.

And these…… the next day…………………awaiting…….more……..sweet pain and pleasure

A text sent…”Since I couldn’t say it out loud….I feel extraordinarily filthy in a most sexy way today….like Your slut.” Response: “good gurl..you are!” My pussy throbbed and dripped. I could feel the wetness run down my thighs every time I got up. Having not worn panties under my dress, it would stick a bit when I got up. Discretely pulling it away from my wet flesh turned me on even more. Standing at the copier on the empty side of the room, I hurriedly ran my fingers up my thigh and brushed my bare cunt lips. I moaned quietly and was sure no one saw my slutty deed. I found it extremely hard to not play with myself as I sat at my desk. I was very aware of my flesh….every inch of it under my clothes. It became almost impossible to concentrate on anything else. My eyes roamed to the hallway outside the office. I twitched when I saw Him. Master was walking towards me. What in the world was He doing here? It was the middle of the work day. Odd. No one else paid much attention to Him, although I was sure they had to see Him.

 He came over to my desk, grabbed a handful of hair, pulled my head back and whispered in my ear. I stayed still, feeling His breath, hot on my neck. I heard  His voice….”Stand up” Doing as I was told, the others in the room didn’t exist to me anymore. I simply obeyed, not giving any thought to what they may see or think. Master pushed my head down to my desk, raising my ass in the air. Reaching down, He raked His nails up the back of my thighs as He raised my dress to my waist. Still, the only thing I could think of was the sting of His hand that I would soon feel on my hot skin. Not a single thought of the others around us. He scratched and squeezed my ass until I was whimpering, begging Him to slap me. Ever so quietly, I said, “Oh god please Master……please” Suddenly, I heard the slap, feeling the white-hot pain quickly thereafter. Screaming, I came instantly. He continued to redden my ass, with His hands and my ruler, right there at my desk, in front of several other people. The only sounds I heard were the slaps and my moaning and screaming.

Turning my head to the side, I felt the coolness of the desk on my cheek. Opening my eyes, I saw three of those I work with simply standing there….watching….smiling. In full view was my fire red ass. But that wasnt enough for Master. He smiled and kicked my legs far apart. Pressing on the small of my back so that I arched, my pussy was now visible to all.  He rubbed it and pulled the lips so far out I thought I would rip apart. But all I did was come….my honey running down my thighs onto a puddle on the floor.

As my head was swimming, I felt His hands rub my ass and lower my dress. I stood up and He was gone. As fast as He appeared, He vanished. Looking around, I saw everyone was back to work. Thinking that possibly I had imagined the whole thing, I pulled my chair up to sit down. The sting and ache I felt when I sat told me that I had not imagined anything.

The only thing I can think of now is how horney I am. How I want to show someone my pussy…my bare wet lips…just for the shear pleasure of seeing their reaction. And how I am craving that sting….the ache….the orgasm. I am finding it nearly impossible to think of anything else.  

Right now, I can think only of what Master provides for me.

Holy cow! Time flies when you are having fun! I haven’t been here in what seems like weeks. What with the new job and Masters needs and desires, I stay quite busy these days. But I do miss blogging, even when I don’t know what to blog about.

Jynx, my cat, has found a new play place. I was folding clothes the other night and she jumped in the empty dryer. Thinking that was the best thing since cat nip, she rolled and played for quite a while. You see, back home, my washer and dryer were in the basement and she never got the chance to get down there. She is 100% inside kitty. She had never seen one before. Master saw it as a photo op, and snapped a couple of good ones. Be sure to remember to click on them to see them bigger.

Things have been plugging along here very well. Master and I are keeping the communication open and honest. The man cannot read my mind, nor I His. I shared with Him today that I would like to do more sensation play. He asked me to elaborate so that He understood. I was a bit hesitant to share in the beginning, as I thought that maybe He would think that I was dissatisfied with our time now. And that is the furthest thing from the truth. The only was I could explain it was that I want to experience everything with Him. Many many different things. I am His slave and His whore, and I am greedy. I want it all. teehee 

I love to hear from you all…..if you get a minute or two, tell me about your sensation play. What types of things do you use? Where does it take your head? I love ideas!!!! 

Until another time…..SOONER than later……hugs 

And here I sit…..used hard, put away clean and dry, and most content. Sitting on the couch earlier chatting with Master and opened my dumb mouth! *giggle* Before I knew it I was on the floor, kowtowing before Him, taking every single thing He was giving me and loving it. It has been quite a long time since I have come so many times. With only the ring of the anal beads visible, Master worked my pussy in His wonderous way. I shared with Him some time ago that I wanted very much to be fisted, and today, He tells me that I came close to taking His whole fist. *sigh*

I am whole…..tonight….I asked Master if I could ponder a bit ….so off I go!

PS….my dearest reme….thank you! My ass was beat for you! *giggle* 

Hey there!  Just a quick note from Master’s abode! All is well here. The job is going quite well. I can only hope that they are as happy with me as I am with them.

I am learning to think before I speak more and more. Sometimes I even cover my mouth if something starts to come out. And I hum too. I do not know if Master minds that, I sure hope not, cause it helps me. I can just hum very quietly, almost to myself, so to speak, and in a second, the words pass without coming out of my mouth. Pretty nifty huh?

Master has been in a different kind of space this weekend. He has little interest in slow warm up’s with the crop. I am told to “assume the position” *giggle* I feel a couple of swats, and then whoosh and the sting begins! Owie owie owie! Master says “Whats wrong slavegurl…you don’t like? ” My response, “Its a love/hate thing Master…a love/hate thing!?” “Here’s your love/hate thing gurl” owie left cheek….owie right cheek…  He adores the crop! *shakes head and giggles*

He has been talking alot more to me during a scene…which you all know I adore! The sounds of His voice and the words He says to me are like..uhm..oh I cant think of the right word. A comfort…a spark, a stroke, like fire and ice all at once. I close my eyes, listen for Him and the noises He makes, feel His touch be it through the crop, the paddle, the flogger, or His fingers, and float away! Knowing that I am always anchored to Him and always and forever safe in Him.

OK need to run for now…….chores to finish!  Love to all!